Leaders Struggle, Too

​Leaders struggle. Should leaders share their struggles with others? Steven Snyder’s book, Leadership and the Art of Struggle, inspired this guest blog post by Becky Robinson. 

Leadership and the Art of the Struggle, posits that struggle is an unavoidable and positive force on each leader’s journey. It is only through embracing our struggles that we can grow to be stronger and even more effective as leaders.

And talking about our struggles can be an important part of the journey.

But how, when, and in what context can leaders share their struggles? Is it possible to share struggles with the people you are leading?

While I think it is important to let your team know you are human and to discuss struggle in general, you want to be careful about the specifics you choose to share.

Here are three ideas to consider when sharing leadership struggles.

Dig into the past for struggles to share. Even though you may have current struggles, it may not be helpful to share those with your team. Instead, you can share past struggles as a way to highlight learning, show progress, and encourage those who may be struggling with similar issues. It’s okay to let your team know you struggle, while maintaining distance by avoiding sharing specifics of current struggles.

Record current struggles to share in the future. Every lesson you learn now can be a gift to others…later. Use a personal journal to record your lessons and growth and wait until a significant amount of time has passed before sharing the struggles with those you are leading.

Find a trusted friend or coach to be a sounding board for current struggles. Venting to team members about struggles could cause serious problems for you as a leader. Instead, rely on a trusted friend or coach who can keep sensitive information confidential.

This week is the official launch of the book. You can buy it on Amazon or read a free preview and learn more at snyderleadership.com. 

Women's Networks in the Workplace

I pull posts from my archives each week. This week, rather than searching for a post on a specific topic, I took another approach. My daughter is 12 years old so I went 12 pages back in my history and selected the post at the top of the page. We're flashing back to women's networks in the workplace.

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I am a woman, I seek out books and blogs written by women, I am coached by a woman, and I am one of three founding members of the very cool, soon-to-be-released Women of HR website.

So, why does the idea of a women's network in the workplace make me uneasy?

A Sum of My Experiences

I listened closely last month during the Women's Leadership Conference as panel members discussed  women's networks. One senior woman leader stated she declined to participate in the women's network because, "she was not a victim." This stopped me in my tracks with a flicker of recognition. Wow.

Flashback to 1985 to me as a brand new second lieutenant looking to make a name for myself. I was highly encouraged to join a women's network by my battalion commander. That network was the officer's wives club. Good intentions and gender aside, I had little in common with this group.

Flashback to early 1990s to me reporting into a new unit. My commander held the door for me, offered me his seat, and, clearly uncomfortable, asked if he could make me some coffee. Tucking away this little power of balance nugget, I assured him I was more capable than most of the men in his unit. We took it to the pistol range. Girl out shoots boy. Case closed.

The women's networks of 2010 are very different from the officer wives clubs of 1985, yet they leave me with the same uneasiness. 

Proving a Point

I'd like to say my prowess with a 9mm back in the day was a result of my natural marksman skills, but it was not. It was the result of one non-commissioned officer, my Lady Wesson, weekends at the Ramstein Rod and Gun club, and a desire to prove a point. That was not the first time I felt I had to prove a point, nor was it the last.

I was treated differently because of my gender and that was the last thing I wanted. Is that what this uneasiness is all about? Or is it because women's networks do not belong in the workplace?