Leadership Lessons from the Classroom

Leadership. Sometimes it's so quiet that if you didn't know what you were looking for, you'd miss it.

My daughter started middle school and has had so many opportunities in just the first 4 weeks. One of those was election for student council. So, with 9 students in her homeroom interested in the coveted leadership spot, each set out to create a poster . . .

. . . and prepare a speech to solicit votes from their peers.

"Hi, I'm Tarah and I'm running for Student Council. I am reliable and responsible and would like to represent you. I am also able to to do something kind of unusual. I can do this <insert freaky finger trick here.> I'm sorry, I just had to make sure you were awake. Like I said, I would like to represent you on the student council. I appreciate your vote and respect your decision. I also brought in some treats for your enjoyment." <parent note: this line was overridden by the teacher and the Fudge Stripes were not mentioned or shared until after the vote!>

When my husband and I saw Tarah later that day - she was psyched. She LOVED giving the speech and friends told her she was funny, she did not talk too fast and she seemed so comfortable. Giggling and unable to contain her excitement, she wanted to do it again - even though she did not get elected. 

"We're so proud of you for going for it" we said, "look at the wonderful experience you had." Playing with the kid we said, "At least you know you got one vote - your own."

"No," she said. "I had 2 votes and I did not vote for myself."

What?! Turns out she took her 2 votes and used 1 vote for friend A because she was nervous and did a great job on her speech and the other vote for friend B because she thought she'd be a great representative.

Wow, I thought, as I settled back and took a close look at the young girl sitting beside me. Mistaking my pride for doubt, she asked if that was the right thing to do.

Absolutely.

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The story doesn't end there.

A few days later she came home sad. It seems a friend told her she lost the election because she didn't vote for herself. <darn kids> I could see the struggle between for self and for others multiplied by middle school drama.

We talked about not knowing how the votes were distributed, remembering how psyched she was after the presentation and how good it felt to support her 2 friends. We talked about winning vs. being a good person and about how we were so very proud of her.

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Leaders bring out the best in others and, when it's all said and done, that's who people follow. 

I know leadership is not about pomp and circumstance yet I have to wonder, is there still a place for quiet leadership in the loud world we live in today? 

Honey, I Lost The Kid

There is nothing lonelier than seeing other people go about their day completely unaware that you've just been to a spot where you expected to see your child waiting for you and she wasn't there.

Where is she? Why isn't she here? Did we get our signals crossed? Did she bike left and I ran right? Is she hurt?

Maybe that's her biking up the hill. She always waits for me at the top of the hill. She's not there. She likes to ride fast down the hill, I am sure she'll be there at the bottom waiting for me. She's not there. I look around. She wouldn't get this far ahead of me. We've been biking/running these routes for 3 summers and it is not like us to be separated like this.

Where is Tarah? I am about 2 miles into a 4 mile loop and as far away from the start/finish as I can be. Do I go back . . . or keep moving forward?

There is a strip mall up ahead so I run to a phone closest to the bike path and call a friend. Please help me, I can't find Tarah. I get back on the path hoping she'll see me. I don't see her anywhere. My head starts to spin while my world stands still. Then panic strikes. I flag down one car and then another. One very kind woman <a mom> quickly begins to drive the bike route while another gentleman calls 911.

Within minutes, it all comes together. As I am on the phone with the dispatcher, my friend's husband pulls up and tells me his wife is with Tarah back at the car and she is fine. The other mom returns -   someone had seen Tarah and she offers to take me there. I tell her Tarah is now with a friend of mine and thank her profusely for stopping and looking. The gentleman with the phone left before I had a chance to properly thank him. After speaking with the police, I head to my daughter.

With my permission, Tarah had taken a quick detour to bike around the school parking lot as I kept running. When she headed back to the trail and did not see me, she thought that I was ahead of her. She biked to catch up with me and when she did not see me, headed to our finishing point thinking I was already there. When I was not, she opened her bike pack, took out the car keys and my BB and was going to call a family friend in town.

See, the kid had the BB the whole time. So when I ran to the first phone to call a friend, I could have called Tarah. When I asked the gentleman to call 911, I could have asked him to call Tarah. I did not know where my little girl was and I had to find her. I wasn't thinking straight.

Tarah kept her wits much better than I did. It's cool that she thought I was running so fast she had to bike to catch up with me. Cool, but not reality. What's real is that this little girl is the very center of my entire world.

Honey, I found the kid.