The Military Family: A Day in the Life Sunday

I am unwrapping posts from the archives and mixing the old with the new. Enjoy this post from the past.

When people find out I am a veteran and the questions come, I tend to deflect the focus away from me. People don't always understand why. Let me explain.

iStockphoto

Wearing my uncle's wool top from the Navy was the extent of my connection to the military as a child. While I vividly recall watching the Army commercials when I was in grade school - the ones with the silhouetted profiles of  soldiers running over the crest of a hill - my first real introduction to the military did not occur until college.

I was a freshman when I noticed Reserve Officer Training Corps (ROTC) cadets rappelling off the science center. Long story short, looked like fun, the chance of a scholarship was enticing, I had nothing else planned at the time -  joined ROTC. One thing lead to another and, with Bachelors degree in hand, I was commissioned and on active duty soon after graduation.

I saw active duty as a three-year opportunity to see the world and advance my education. Add in the fact that I'd get a paycheck and it was a mighty good deal for a college kid with some debt and a biology degree. 

For me, this was a job - a temporary gig. It wasn't long before I realized that for others, this was so much more. For the soldiers I had the honor of working alongside of and leading, this was their life. Even as my three years turned into 10, I knew in my heart it wasn't ever going to be that way for me.

I was single, on my own and with no particular place to be. I didn't give up anything (other than a social life) yet there were sacrifices being made all around me. From the supply sergeant's wife who threw herself into Girl Scouts so she and the girls had something to carry them through the absences, the drill sergeant (psycho-like to new recruits) who kept his daughter's teddy bear in his desk drawer, and the commander who, missing most of her children's birthdays, vowed not ever miss those of her grandchildren - tough heart-wrenching choices were made everyday. 

There was sacrifice but there was not sadness. There was honor, inspiration and pride in being part of something bigger than yourself. And while I got to be a part of that, it wasn't about me at all. It was about doing what I could to  honored the commitment and sacrifice of the military family. 

Reach out to a Veteran and their family today to thank them for their service and let them know you care.

===> Do you think leaders need to "Grow up and Lead?" I do. Help me spread the word by clicking here and then "Yes, please write this manifesto" at ChangeThis. Voting ends Jan 4.

A Leader's Privilege

I am unwrapping posts from the archives and mixing the old with the new. Enjoy this post from the past.

Leadership is not for the faint of heart. Or a know-it-all.

Photo credit: iStockphoto

Leadership Fail

Flash to a conference room in Anywhere, U.S.A. for a weekly project meeting. A leader is sitting at the head of the table with his project managers all around. The project hit a snag and a 2 week adjustment to the plan is in order. The leader has a plan and is prepared to communicate it to the team.

The leader convenes the meeting, communicates the change in plans and a project manager raises a concern. The leader explains his reasoning for the particular course of action he selected.

The project manager considers the leader’s reasons and offers his operational perspective on another option. The leader restates his reasoning.

The project manager identifies pros and cons of the two options and requests a change in direction. The leader restates his reasoning.

In the next 30 seconds, employee engagement would be lost.

When the project manager spoke again, it went something like this, “I recommend, and prefer, an alternate course of action  . . .  but you are the boss. If you want us to do it your way, we will.”

Did anyone else just see what I did? Absent the project manager throwing his hands in the air, it was a clear declaration of defeat.

I looked to my left, I looked to my right and I looked to the leader - just in time to hear him restating his reasoning again.

Leadership Lesson

Leadership is hard work. Leadership is about inspiring people and leading change. It's about being present in the moment to influence options and approaches to new or long-standing issues.

The 2 week change in plans would not determine the success and failure of the project; it was a matter of preference and approach. The leader did ultimately agree to accept the project manager's suggestion, but it was too late. Presented with an opportunity to engage the team in jointly solving a problem, he chose to hold his ground.

Leaders have the benefit, and responsibility, of position. Rank does have its privileges but being right is not one of them. Leadership is not about self, it’s about others and leaders are judged by their actions. How a leader views, and acts upon, their leadership privilege speaks volumes.

What are your actions saying about you?

===.> Do you think leaders just need to "Grow up and Lead?" I do. Help me spread the word by clicking here and then "Yes, please write this manifesto" at ChangeThis. Voting ends Jan 4.